Hesitant Much, eh?
by LyxaneLhaerry
Summary: Both are heart-broken, both are longing for the other. Still, past experiences make them unsure of embracing one another. Jasper met Edward one night and with a great uncertainty admitted that he attracted to Edward. Still, they were not sure of the attractions they felt. With a sigh, Jasper took his first step. Well, who knows? They just need to try and talk it out, right?
1. Chapter 1

**a/n. The song is based on How to Love by Lil' Wayne and this story is the result of the stress in the middle of doing my papers for midterm. It's my first attempt on fanfiction, by the way, so I make it T-rated. It might go up? I'm not sure, but I'll just see it later. :D**

 **Hope it's alright and I'll accept any reviews but please do it nicely.**

 **As what people say, I DON'T OWN the character and the song. Thankies~**

* * *

 _Cut the music up, little louder_

 _Y_ _eah_

* * *

"Oh, goodness, Jazz! Stop being a hermit and come with us!"

There was no answer to that shout. Rosalie Hale knew, his twin, Jasper Hale was trying to deter her by not saying anything and locking his door. Again, Rose knocked the door as loud as possible while her fiancé, Emmett Cullen, was standing behind her, trying hard to hide his laugh behind his hand.

"Fine! You leave with no other choice!" Rosalie shouted again and the beautiful, 5.6 ft, 29 years old woman stomped away.

Jasper shifted on his bed. He tried to listen for any signs of Rosalie trying to do something to his door. When he was sure that Rosalie has gone, he sighed and looked at the ceiling of his bedroom before he sat up, hugging his pillow tightly. He knew he was sulking like a child but for now, he did not care. After a case of bad break up almost two year ago, Jasper avoided any kinds of meeting in clubs or bars. That was where he met his last boyfriend before.

Ooh, yes, it was true. Jasper Hale was gay and he was proud of it, especially since he knew that his appearance and body would certainly appeal people to come to him. With lean body of a bit past 6.3 ft and blonde hair, he had managed to charm many people. Still, not that gay was the problem.

His last boyfriend of four and a half years cheated on him for about a year, ten months, and fourteen days ago. Oh, no, no, no. Jasper did not count the time since he broke up with Seth Clearwater. He especially did not count the time when he found out that Seth cheated on him with Jacob Black, Seth's childhood friend, which was about a year, ten months, and sixteen days ago. No, it was just a prove that Jasper was a genius.

It was Christmas holiday and Rosalie had come from New York to Seattle to celebrate it like they usually did. The problem was Rosalie seemed to take it into her own hand to make sure that he found a new boyfriend. So today, five days before Christmas, Rosalie was set to force him hunting in clubs, bars, pubs, and whatever it was called in the town until Christmas Eve.

Suddenly, there was a rattling sound outside his bedroom and Jasper knew what happened. With a groan he lay back on the bed.

"Why the hell would you force me to go, Rose?" Jasper huffed.

"You've sulked too long and I grow annoyed watching you doing it. Now get up, wash up, and change before I set Em to do it for you," Rosalie commanded before she walked out. Emmett grinned as he folded his hands in front of his chest and looked at Jasper who sighed exasperatedly before he dragged himself up to his private bathroom.

"You know, Jazz, I'm so not wanna be set out to help you in your beauty time so you might want to hasten it," he said as he stepped out too. "We're gonna wait downstairs! Don't worry about choosing clothes. Who knows who'll be attracted to you." With a big grin on his face, Emmett whistled and walked downstairs, looking for Rosalie.

Knowing that his twin sister's words were somewhat true, Jasper slowly browsing through his clothes. After a few sigh of being unsure, he settled on a blue T-shirt, which was the same shade with his eyes, light grey sweater, and faded jeans. Making his way downstairs, he could hear his sister talking to someone on the phone.

When he arrived, he sent a look at Emmett to ask who it was that made his sister looked so enthusiastic. Emmett sent him a grin and mouthed "Alice" to him. Jasper rolled his eyes, knowing Alice was her sister's partner in her clothes shop, the fashion designer of the clothes, and the only other girl who Rosalie accepted as equal.

"Alright then, Al, let's see later. I'll be on my way. Make sure you wear that new outfit!" Rosalie said before she cut her phone. She then looked at Jasper, trying to see whether his outfit is acceptable or not before she gave a nod and dragged Emmett to the car. "Come on, it's already past eight."

Jasper shrugged as he and Emmett looked at each other, sniggering, then locked the front door and got into the car. He was silent in the car, not because he did not want to talk but Rosalie was again on the phone with Alice and it was not possible to talk when Rosalie was talking. So, yeah, the boys stayed silent.

"Come on, babe, we're here," Emmett told Rosalie when he parked the car, an indication for Rosalie that she needed to stop the phone.

"Yeah, Al, I'm here. See you inside!"

"I don't know Alice is here too," Jasper said, looking at Rosalie curiously.

"Of course she's here! Her adopted brother also lives here, I've told you before," Rosalie answered as she walked quickly inside, followed by Emmett.

"Yeah, but you said that her brother always go to New York whenever they have holidays."

"It's called a change of habit, Jazz," Emmett said with a hint of joke in it. Again, Jasper rolled his eyes to the man who was an inch taller than him.

"I know, I just wanna know why suddenly it changes."

"Well, you can ask her yourself. It's been a long time since you meet her," Rosalie cut them to stand on the edge of the dance floor to look for Alice. "Help me look for her, she wore a dark red halter top, knee-length sequin dress." Both men could only glance at each other with a knowing look and looked back to the dance floor.

That was when Jasper spotted the 5.2 ft girl with pixie-cut brown hair. Alice was dancing with a man who seemed to be a feet taller than her with lean body, swift moves, and soft bronze hair. His black turtleneck shirt showed his body definition well and his blue jeans shaped his legs perfectly.

Right at that moment, Alice saw them and waved her hand to call them, the man stopped and turned to face them. As Rosalie waved back at her, Emmett gave her a wolfish grin and a glance at Jasper. Rosalie smirked back at him smugly. They knew by Jasper's expression that their decision was right.


	2. Chapter 2

**a/n. So, this is the next chapter. Hope this works alright too.**

 **By the way, I cut the whole song into several parts and the story is following each part so I hope you, guys, don't get confused.**

 **Again, I'll accept any reviews, just please do it kindly.**

 **I still don't own the character and the song. Thankies~**

* * *

 _You had a lot of crooks tryna steal your heart_

 _Never really had luck, couldn't ever figure out_

 _How to love_

 _How to love_

* * *

Alice pulled the man's hand over to them and she smiled widely to Rosalie before hugging her. Emmett slipped out for a while to look for a table for them to sit and when he finally found one on the corner, far enough from the dance floor so they do not really need to shout to talk to each other, he waved Jasper to bring the group over there.

"So, how's it, Jazzie? Still teaching? I heard you're being childish at home?" Alice asked as soon as they sat. Emmett answered that with a loud laugh and playfully shoved Jasper.

"Yeah, _Jazzie_ , entertain us with a story," he said as he laughed, followed by Alice's giggle. Rosalie then hit him on the back of his head.

"Em, let Alice introduce her brother to us first!" Rosalie complained. Jasper and Alice chuckled at that while the man who turned out to be Alice's brother only smiled at that.

"Yeah, so this is my brother, Edward. He lives and works here. Since it's quite boring to always be in New York, I ask him to let me come here this time," Alice said. "Well, Ed, this is Rosalie, my partner-in-crime in shop, you've never met her before cause she always come back to Seattle in holidays. This bulky man is Emmett, Rose's fiancé, and the last one is her twin, Jasper." Edward gave them each a nod as a response.

"So, what do you do here, Edward?" Emmett asked. " _Jazzie_ here works as a history teacher in high school." This time, it was Jasper who slapped Emmett on the back of his head.

" _Don't_ call me Jazzie, Em!"

"Why? It's so fun!" Emmett exclaimed. Rosalie rolled her eyes and turned to Alice to talk about their shop, letting the men talked and joked by their own.

"Really, _Emmie_ , let's see what you say about fun, yeah?" Jasper grinned as he heard Edward chuckled when Jasper changed Emmett's name.

"Alright, fine, point taken," Emmett said with a slight pout. He then turned back to Edward and asked the question again.

"Oh, well, I'm teaching too… Music… In elementary school near my house…" he answered. Jasper was stunned. Listening to that voice was refreshing for him. He liked the smooth baritone voice came from the man who sat beside Alice. Emmett huffed.

"Yeah, the life of us, teachers."

"Hey! It's not bad being a teacher! If you don't wanna be a teacher, you shouldn't sign up being a sport instructor before!" Jasper complained, bringing more chuckles from Edward. Emmett shoved Jasper playfully and stood to hug Rosalie's waist.

"Babe, your twin keeps on harassing me, let's just go and dance," Emmett whined slightly to Rosalie who just stared at him flatly.

"Do you just whine?" Rosalie asked. "Never mind, let's go," she said and walked to the dance floor, followed by Alice and Edward.

Jasper decided to stay and drank a couple of beers. He sat on his seat and looked at Edward who was having fun with Alice. By the looks given by people near him, Jasper knew that Edward was certainly what people would call gorgeous. Some people who were sitting on the tables and the bar were also paying attention to him. Still, Edward was only dancing with Alice.

' _Oh, damn it! You told yourself you won't look for another man from the club and here you got your attention caught by a man; the brother of your twin's best friend, in a club! Smooth, Jazzie, you're being a real hypocrite,_ ' Jasper thought to himself. He huffed and drank some more before he tried to remove the dancing bronze-haired man from his mind.

Yeah, Jasper was trying to find another thing to think about which only led him to go back to Edward after a few seconds of thinking. Desperately, he placed his forehead and hit it down to the table.

"Oh, come on, Jazz, you're just tired of having dates with your hand," he grumbled. "No more thought about him, Jazz, no more."

"I believe it's not a really bad idea to keep yourself sober," a voice that was clearly trying to seduce him was heard from Jasper's right side. Reluctantly, Jasper lifted his head to see who it was before he sighed and stared lazily to the owner; a boy in his early twenties with shoulder-length brown hair and twinkling black eyes.

"Yeah, I do believe that I wanna stay sober," Jasper answered before he focused his sight to the dance floor, trying to indicate subtly that he was not interested.

"Sure, I guess you prefer have everything committed in your memory, eh?" The boy then touched Jasper's hand which held the beer can. "I prefer that too," he said as seductive as he could, trying to gauge Jasper's interest.

"Nah, sorry, boy but you're not my type. I'm so not taking someone who's trying to whore himself back to my place," Jasper said uncaringly. As the boy gaped at him, Jasper looked at the boy sharply as a smirk appeared on his face. "Especially someone who does it for a bet," he continued while pointing to a group of young adults counting money on the table, some of them were looking at the boy and others at the money.

"Fine! Your loss!" the boy said and walked away grudgingly. Jasper dared to bet that he was going to be angry at his friends.

With a sigh Jasper shook his head and looked back at the dance floor. His eyes met with a pair of green eyes before the owner looked away and danced again, rejecting several offers to dance both by men and women.

' _Oh… oh… Whoa! He was lookin' at me! He was!_ ' Jasper thought frantically. ' _Alright, alright… Calm down, stupid!_ ' After an exhale he sipped his beer again. ' _So what if Edward was looking at me? It might be only a glance or he just wanted to check on me, making sure I'm not drunk or something. There was no way in hell and back he was looking at me and my reaction to the boy. Oh, fuck! Stop being such a teenage girl in love, Jasper! You're thinking nonsense thi—_ '

Jasper was stopped from his internal monologue when he remembered what he had thought about. A few coughs and sips of beer, he exhaled again. Hitting his head on the table again for a couple of times, Jasper then put his head on his hands on the table.

' _I'm so not in love with Edward! Sure he's attractive but that's it! I've just met him, for God's sake!_ ' Jasper chanted the whole he's-attractive-but-I-don't-love-him again and again, emphasizing each word, trying to make sure that that was the truth. A seemingly pointless thought, though. ' _This is silly!_ ' he thought in the end then he lifted his head to see what Edward and the others were doing.

His eyes found the bronze-haired man easily, still rejecting people's offer. Though Edward seemed angry, he tried as politely as he could to reject them. Even some of them were gluing their body to Edward, clearly trying to entice him, he still tried to be polite. However, Jasper knew, by his body language and the twitching of his eyes, Edward was close to kicking those people out.

' _Stupid horny people. They won't get anything from Edward with the way they force him. By the way he answered us before, it's clear he'll choose someone in his own way. He's far too independent, awkwardly independent and shy. Still, those people can't read him clearly. Oh, of course they can't! Their mind was full of hormones. They should see, if they want Edward, they need to do it delicately…_ '

And Jasper drowned in his thought about how to handle Edward delicately more and more.


	3. Chapter 3

**a/n. Oh, oh… I haven't updated anything for months. OAO**

 **I'm so sorry… No valid excuses but no ideas for quite a long time and it's actually my responsibility, soooo…**

 **Here is the next chapter! I still don't own anything but ideas... sadly...  
**

* * *

 _You had a lot of moments that didn't last forever_

 _Now you're in a corner tryna put it together_

 _How to love_

 _How to love_

* * *

"Daydreaming?" A gentle voice cut Jasper's thought out, making him paying attention to the owner of the voice.

"Uh, yeah, sorry…" he said, somehow quite embarrassed for being caught daydreaming while the object of his daydreaming was right beside him.

"Uhm… It's alright… I mean, it can be quite boring—"

"—No! No, no, I mean, being with you isn't boring, Edward. You know sometimes my thoughts are flying on its own and…" Jasper stopped his ramble as he realized that Edward started to chuckle because of his sentence. "Oh, well, alright, go on, laugh all you want," Jasper huffed playfully. It only sent Edward to another bout of laugh.

As he reveled on Edward's voice of laughter, Jasper reminded himself of what he was doing right now. After that first meeting, Jasper had tried to talk with Edward. Having gained enough courage even to ask his number though Jasper knew that Rosalie and especially Emmett would tease him to death after that.

One text led to a call which led to a meeting and here they were in the umpteenth meeting way in the Summer as they had a little holiday. They were not close enough as much as Jasper wanted though. Still, it was enough for Jasper to meet often with Edward with the excuses of having to rant about students. Oh, hey! Jasper was still able to meet him and be amazed by Edward everytime. That surely made his day!

"Hey, earth to Jazzie," Edward called out. Jasper once again huffed when he realized that he had gone away daydreaming on his own again. "Where do you go this time? Mars? Jupiter?" he laughed again.

"Yeah, I'm going to Venus this time," Jasper answered as he ate his fries. Edward grinned and stole the fries.

"Sounds fun. Any civilization over there?"

"Yeah, I was having fun with a whole bunch of beautiful girls." Edward chuckled again and picked on his waffle.

They were sitting on a café for a brunch in the corner of the café. Jasper could not comprehend why Edward always chose to sit on the corner but he could not just ask him about it too, right? He had a feeling that it was quite private for Edward.

"You want to ask something," Edward stated as he looked right to Jasper's eyes. Jasper himself only scratched his hair nervously. "You can ask, you know."

"Well, yeah, not sure, Ed." Jasper's answer made Edward raised his eyebrow in expectation. He knew, he would ask Edward, anyway. "Nah, was just wondering why you always chose the corner to sit on. That's it…"

Edward took a drink and coughed a little before he sighed and shrugged. Going back to his waffle, Edward tried to decide whether he should tell Jasper or not. After all, Jasper had told him quite some things about his past relationships.

"You don't need to answer," Jasper said. "I don't mind, I just wonder. That's it."

"Yeah, I know… but I think you might need to know, anyway."

"Hey, you don't have any obligations for it, you know," Jasper stopped Edward from telling him. Knowing that forcing Edward to tell him was not the right thing to do. Edward needed to tell him about whatever it was on his own term.

"Well, actually, it's not like I make it into a super-secret secret… Alice knows about it, she guesses it right and your twin seems to realize it too, so… yeah, I can at least tell my friend about it too," Edward tried to answer nonchalantly. On the other side, Jasper's mind was kind of floored of hearing Edward considered him as a friend. He had a feeling that if possible, he would jumped like a kid on Christmas Day. It was not that he never thought Edward would consider him a friend but more because Alice and Rosalie had reminded him time and time again that Edward would not want to go anywhere near him if Edward knew Jasper wanted a relationship with him.

A weak slap on his forearm brought Jasper back to reality. A grin that had decorated Edward's face made Jasper sighed and grumbled.

"Don't you dare say any word about daydreaming."

"I'm not! You say that word yourself!" Edward exclaimed, followed by a wide grin.

"I say 'any word about…'!" Jasper replied.

"But you still say that word."

"Oh, fine," Jasper finally said and rolled his eyes. The grin still existed on Edward's face.

"Right, so I'm still going to tell you," Edward finally said though he was more relaxed now. Jasper pursed his lips, not sure about it, but he nodded otherwise. "Well, I'm going to make it short… Since I was in high school, many people are interested with me and, well, I was a teenager wanting to explore myself, so, well… there were times where I accept people's advance on me for a… quickie… kind of… Then, someone happened…"

"He hurt you and now you feel like hiding from everything…" Jasper interrupted, not a question as much as a statement. Edward gave him a smile, a self-deprecating one. "I'm not sure this is what you wanna hear… but I kinda know what you mean… I mean, you know my story with Seth. I was serious with him but before? I always tried to seduce people, I wanted to know how I could interest others on me and… well, I took pride on it."

"Seth happened and you closed yourself, sulked, and pouted all around the house," Edward continued, using the exact same word Rosalie and Emmett had said many times when they were teasing Jasper. He knew Edward was trying to make the mood happier so Jasper went with it and scoffed.

"You don't need to copy Rose and Em on it."

"Yes, _kiddo_ , go and sulk all you want, kid," Edward said between his grin and laugh.


End file.
